Death Metal English

Death Metal English – kann dazu mal jemand eine seriöse linguistische Studie machen? Ich gehe schwer davon aus, dass da sehr viel dran ist und soweit ich weiß, gab es auch schon linguistische Studien zu Hip Hop. Außerdem würde ich sie echt gerne lesen. Also: „Adjectives: In Death Metal English, they’re like guitar solos. You aren’t using enough. Add more.“

I’ve identified some common traits of Death Metal English below:

Big, polysyllabic words: You don’t have to use them correctly; you just have to use them. Bonus points for Greco-Latinate words that end in “-ition,” “-ation,” “-ution,” “-ous,” “-ized,” “-ism,” “-ance,” “-ial,” “-ity,” and variations thereon. Double bonus points for words ending semi-inappropriately in “-ment,” as in “Torn Into Enthrallment.” These words don’t even have to be real. Is Wormed’s “Multivectorial Reionization” a real thing? Who cares?

Adjectives: In Death Metal English, they’re like guitar solos. You aren’t using enough. Add more. […]

My favorite thing about Death Metal English is that it isn’t subject matter-specific. Of course, it works best when you’re talking about Satan, or Lovecraft, or murder or whatever. But you can turn pretty much any phrase or sentence into fodder for a sick death metal song using the same tropes:

Normal English: “Commuting to work”
Death Metal English: “TRANSPORTATION OF THE WAGEBOUND UNTO THE NEXUS OF PERPETUAL QUOTIDIAN ENSLAVEMENT”

Normal English: “This bok choy isn’t very good”
Death Metal English: “CASTIGATING THE VERDANT ISSUANCE OF THE SOILS OF JIANGNAN”

Normal English: “I need to take a nap”
Death Metal English: “RIPPED INTO THE UTTER EXHAUSTION OF THE MIDDLE DAY”

Normal English: “Thanks for explaining the train schedule”
Death Metal English: “PROFFERING GRATITUDE UPON THE CHRONOCRATION OF THE JUGGERNAUTS OF RETICULATED METALS AND FIRE”

Normal English: “You have to mow the lawn”
Death Metal English: “BRING DOWN THE SCYTHE OF GODS UPON THE NECKS OF THE GREEN-RIBBED LEGIONS AND SWEEP AWAY THEIR WRETCHED BODIES; THOU ART IMPLORED BY ME”

Death Metal English (via MeFi)