NASA Launches David Bowie Concept Mission

The Onion haben anlässlich der letzten Space Shuttle-Mission nochmal einen alten Artikel von Anfang 2010 gepostet, in dem die NASA eine Bowie-Mission mit Major Tom Louis, Major Tom Greely, Major Tom Ohweiler, Major Thomas Sinclair und Major Tom Keenan startet, während der die fünf Toms sexuelle Identitäten in Zero-G untersuchen sollen.

NASA officials announced today the successful launch of the new shuttle Moonage Daydream, marking the beginning of a long-anticipated two-week conceptual mission inspired by British rock star David Bowie.

According to NASA administrator Maj. Gen. Charles F. Bolden, Jr., the highly experimental glam space program—dubbed Project Starman—has been in development for exactly five years. Though engineers initially feared the mission might "blow our minds," the historic launch ultimately proceeded without incident. […]

According to Ryschkewitsch, the astronauts, or "spaceboys," as they will be called during the mission, are equipped with state-of-the-art pressurized suits.

"These new suits are veneered with a protective silver lamé to complement the multicolored lightning bolts emblazoned across the helmets' sun visors," Ryschkewitsch said. "They've also been updated with several improved components to ensure the team is completely safe when it's time to leave the capsule—if they dare."

The five-member crew is made up entirely of United States Air Force officers and includes Maj. Tom Louis, Maj. Tom Greely, Maj. Tom Ohweiler, Maj. Thomas Sinclair, and Maj. Tom Keenan.

While the mission will primarily study paranoia, decadence, and the fluidity of sexual identity in a zero-gravity environment, additional scientific testing will be conducted during the shuttle's 14-day orbit of Earth.

NASA Launches David Bowie Concept Mission