A Review of the Simpsons Porn-Parody

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Splitsider hat ein Review der Simpsons Porn-Parody. Essential Must-Read of the day.

The Simpsons porn parody hits us with the plot right up top, which was a little disconcerting (I like to WORK for my porn plots) but mostly just refreshing. The film begins with a covert hand-off where Homer receives a single glazed donut in exchange for a sex “tap” that he made with Marge. Which is important, because it tells us that someone on the set of The Simpsons porn parody does not know how to spell “tape.”

From there, we dive right in to the “tap” itself, presumably watching it in real time. Throughout the film, quick static interstitials act as transitions, a neat little trick that adorably tries to maintain the illusion of this being a home video despite the use of dozens of camera angles.

In the first scene we meet Marge (they don’t even bother with parody names in this one), played by an impressively committed Andy San Dimas. She has Marge’s laugh on lock, works in the rasp, and never breaks character (predictably, Marge getting off sounds like Patty/Selma). […] What follows is a pretty standard POV blowj punctuated by off-screen Homer drools, murmurs, and occasional “ooo!"s, which are never not weird. However, the guy voicing Homer/playing Homer’s penis does a phenomenal Homer impression. To the point where for the first ten minutes I thought they might be using actual audio from the show. Then I realized that even in 22 seasons they would have had trouble finding a suitable response to “You like the way I suck your cock, Homey?”

Homer then gets distracted by a television behind Marge, which is playing McBain: The (apparently Made For TV) Porn Parody. A parody within a parody, how Inception of them. We then somehow, even though this is a home video, cut to that scene. Oh well.

The McBain sex scene starts with so much plot that it’s hilarious. McBain (a solid impression from Evan Stone) is in a stand-off with a very poorly cast but excellently referenced Mendoza. There’s also a random girl named Nancy there? And McBain’s mad because Mendoza stole plutonium or something? Not sure. What I am sure about is that Lee Roy is a big fan of McBain references. I’d even go so far as to say he probably saw that YouTube video once.

And thennnnn McBain shoots Mendoza (wrong) and to celebrate whips out his enormous penis. Enormous. Like, imagine how cartoonishly huge the character McBain’s penis probably is, and then that. It honestly ruined the entire scene for me because I was just worried about Nancy’s insides. At one point they’re having sex at such an angle that there is literally nowhere for his penis to go. It has to be going up into her leg. Also ruining the scene for me, this line: McBain: “McBain’s big balls are going to slap on your ass.” Neat.

We then cut back to Marge and Homer, where Marge is nervous to show her goods to the camera because someone might come in. Cue Flanders!

Flanders: (entering) Howdily doodily.
Homer: (O.S.) Flanders, get out!
Flanders: (exiting) Okily dokily.

I prayed to the gods of porn parody that this would be the only time we saw Flanders for the entire movie, and they answered my prayers. A totally unnecessary second-long inclusion of Flanders. I loved it.

It Was All Yellow: Reviewing the Simpsons Porn Parody (via The Awl)

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