Pizza is a legal Solid now

03.03.2011 Misc #Legal #Pizza

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Im Oktober vergangenen Jahres hat ein Mann namens William James Fennie III ein Stück Pizza auf ein vorbeifahrendes Auto geschmissen. Und weil es im Staat Pennsylvania verboten ist, feste Gegenstände auf die Straße zu schmeißen, wurde er festgenommen. Soweit, so absurd. Wird aber noch viel geiler.

Sein Verteidiger zweifelte in der Verhandlung an, dass Pizza als „Feststoff“ zählt und argumentierte, dass die Rechtssprechung in diesem Punkt nicht eindeutig sei. Daraufhin hat der Richter in einem wissenschaftlichen Selbstexperiment bewiesen, dass genau das der Fall ist und deshalb ist Pizza nun offiziell und juristisch eindeutig ein fester Gegenstand im US Staat Pennsylvania. So ist das.

he [the judge] ordered a specimen of pizza, and astutely noticed that “it came in a box (a.k.a. container). It was resting in the bottom of the container, held in place by gravity, and did not take up the shape or full volume of the container.” He therefore ruled out the idea that pizza is a gas (shocking, I know).

For experiment number two, he cut the pizza into six slices because he “was not hungry enough to eat eight pieces” (a la Yogi Berra), and observed that that the slices remained separate and didn’t “re-form to take on the shape of the bottom of the container,” as he writes. Not liquid. Check.

As he writes in his transcript, MacElree conducted his final experiment on the pizza as he raised a slice to his mouth: „I observed that the slice of pizza retained its basic shape, although it did droop a bit at the end. Further, I was able to bite off one piece which required some chewing before I could swallow it. I put the remainder on top of a paper towel and observed that it stayed in place, did not spill onto my desk, and held its shape (less one bite).“

Based on this overwhelming evidence, the judge “concluded that it was a solid,” and therefore denied the attorney’s request to throw out the case.

Judge Performs Own Experiments & Rules That Pizza Is, in Fact, a Solid