Jabbas Khetanna-Segelbarke bei Amazon (für nur 20000 Dollar), sort of

Bei Amazon kann man einen Panzer für nur 20.000 Dollar kaufen, der genauso aussieht, wie Jabbas Khetanna-Segelbarke und der auf den unwahrscheinlichen Namen JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank hört. Hier ein Auszug aus einem Amazon-„Review“:

Forgive my bluntness, but you know how Wookiees are, and Chewbacca is no different. He's either drunk on his ass in a Mos Eisley dive, or maybe rolling with the Ewoks in the local Endorean cathouse. Those Ewoks sure know a few tricks that Heloise doesn't teach. You'll recall that "Endor" is a bastardization of "bend over", and now you know why.

Anyway, once he gets a head of steam going, Chewie won't quit until he blacks out and they dump him in the alley. It's impossible to stop him before he's done, and anybody who tries to get between him and his lady friend is just going to become another party-goer, if you know what I mean. He's got everyone in the spaceport snickering at me.

Jabba slithered up yesterday and asked where my Whoopee was. Yeah, very funny; the only word anybody ever hears him speak is "Whoopee". Actually he doesn't speak it, he screams it. His happy endings wake the entire town, including the dead. And Jabba knew exactly where the son of a bitch was, because Jabba owns the cathouse and the bar and every other joint in the county, and he sends me the bills whenever Chewie goes wild and wrecks a place. Which happens about three times a week.

I'd like to kick Jabba in his fat tail, but his security detail would clap me in irons and I'd spend the next fifty microns mopping up the spent passions of the peanut gallery after Princess Leia's infamous "Bride of the Gungan" show. If my JL421 were a tad more reliable, I'd grab Leia right from under Jabba's ugly nose and race beyond the horizon.

JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank (via IZ Reloaded)