The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.

There are 400,000 words in the English language, and there are seven you can't say on television. What a ratio that is! 399,993 to 7. They must really be baaaad. They must be OUTRAGEOUS to be separated from a group that large. All of you words over here, you seven baaaad words. That's what they told us, right? You know the seven, don't ya? That you can't say on TV? Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker and tits.

101 greatest George Carlin Quotes!